Out of Pain can come something Beautiful and Powerful

From my perspective, mental and emotional anguish seems more difficult than physical pain (keep in mind never broken a bone, knock on wood). If you can imagine the first time you were heartbroken, what did that pain feel like? Did it manifest itself physically as well? How long did it take to heal? How did you feel when it happened, 2 days later vs a month from the incident? When I think of mental turmoil, it almost feels like I won’t be able to survive or get through that pain and storm. It can be overbearing, exhausting, depressing, soul-draining and you feel so many more adjectives/actions.

After my assault, I literally felt like I was broken into pieces. It felt like all of the parts of my body were in different places of the earth and I had no control of them.  It also felt like my emotions did know how to work anymore, let alone know when to show themselves based on the situation. Being prescribed anti-depressants helped with some of my emotions, but others became dormant or non-existent. The pain in my life just seemed to swirl over me like a cloud because it was all I could see in the mirror staring back at me for years. I didn’t think there was beauty within the struggle and storm I was in nor obtainable after.

When I first heard of Kintsugi, the Japanese art of putting broken pottery pieces back together with gold, I always wondered “why would fix something broken with gold? Isn’t it customary for you just to throw away the broken pieces?”.  Learning more about the art, had me start to think about handling pain and learning about how to view my pain. When you are in a storm or just getting out of one, try to remind yourself that something beautiful and powerful can come out of pain. You just have to remind yourself that you are beautiful, your power can not be taken from you, and that nobody can control how you react or feel but you.